The door creaked open, and in the doorway was seen a tall
boy dressed in all black. A black backpack was slung on one shoulder, eyes
dull, lips slightly apart, he was busy taking off his brown shoes. He groaned
as he pulling out his big foot off the shoes, didn't even care to untie the
shoelaces.
After slamming the door closed, he brought his weared body
and plop down his not-too-shabby couch near the door. Chest heaving as sigh
escaped his lips while he finally felt such comfort from his couch. It had
always been a tiring day ever since he joined SM.
He placed his right arm on his forehead and leaned more into
the couch. After a minute or two he began to rummage his backpack, taking out
piles of dark clothing drenched with sweat, his sweat. His sweat from hard
practice he always do everyday.
As his feet brought him to the laundry section of his house,
his train of thoughts went inside his brain.
"At first I didn't know any of it. I lost a game with
my gang back in Canada and went to SM Audition held there. Who knew I'd be scouted?
I had to leave to Korea and join the training. At first I just brushed it off
and felt that I would be kicked away in 3 months."
His hands were on auto-pilot mode, his eyes were blank as he
put his laundry inside the washing machine.
"But I felt it was calling me. The fact is I didn't
know if I want it or not, it drove me crazy. I only did as I was told, every
scold that I took, every corrections that I was told. But I didn't see where it
ends. Will I be stuck doing this to only God and SM know when, or will I be
kicked out because I was just not good enough? Is there a chance for me to
debut? Do even I want to debut?"
He plopped down on his unruly bed which he didn't care
making. He stared at the blank ceiling of his room, arms folded to support his
head.
"I'm tired, but I can't sleep. I'm sick, but I don't
want to give up that easily. But I don't think I'm good enough. Even my Korean
is still a mess."
Suddenly he brought his long torso up to a sitting position.
"I missed speaking Chinese. And here I am stuck in a foreign country not
knowing what my destiny will be. I have no one to talk to. I missed speaking
with my family."
It stabbed into his heart painfully to know the truth. He
missed his loved ones back in Canada. Not within the range to write mail, text
nor call them hurts him the most. In this 8 months of training he hadn't get
any mail from his family. It left him another load in his heart, not knowing
his family's doing.
He held his folded legs close to his chest as he buried his
face between his knees. His heart ached it made him difficult to breathe. He
gritted his teeth until finally a sob was heard in the dim room.
*"Wu Fan, jia you!"*
"I miss you, Mom..." he whispered between sobs.
***
" Your big group will be known as EXO, the subgroups
will be known as EXO K for Korean group and EXO M for Chinese group. And, we
had chosen Joonmyeon as the leader of EXO K. So, EXO M members, have you think
about who the leader will be?"
"I choose Wu Fan. He is the best in handling us."
"Me?"
"Me too. He is calm and has a good temper."
"I vote Wu Fan. He knows many languages. Can break the
language barrier."
"I choose Wu Fan-ge. He is the most handsome among
us."
"I think so too, Manager-hyung. He has strong magnetic
feeling. And he is the tallest so he'll stood out nicely."
"Are you okay with it, Wu Fan?"
"I'll do my best, Manager-hyungnim." I said coming
out from nowhere. I had no choice but agree, yet I felt this nice feeling that
the other five members had faith in me.
"It's decided! Wu Fan, you will be EXO M's leader. Don't
forget, your stage name is Kris. Understand?"
"Yes, Manager-hyungnim." I said with a polite bow.
The twelve of us applauded ourselves as Manager-hyungnim walked out of the
room. There were handshakes, cheerings, and hugs. We would grow in brotherhood,
taking joy and hardships together as one. The thought of it made my heart
swollen in happiness, yet I only smiled to myself.
"Yeay! Leader Kris! No, no, it sounds better with
Dhuizang Kris! What do you say, Wu Fan-ge?"
"I like that nickname." I said with a smile.
***
The white van we were in led us into our new dorm. The six
of us were tired but excited ofter hearing the news from Manager-hyungnim. As
we entered our new dorm, they were all scaterred around the dorm. I could see
Xiumin-ge and Xingxing went to the kitchen to settle their kitchen spaces for
snacks and all. Luhan-ge was checking the three rooms, deciding which one will
be his and Xingxing's. Chen was trying the TV channels while Tao was taking
selcas near the bathroom. I just shook my head, reminding myself to be a calm
leader for them. As I went to the center of the living room, "Guys! Let's
decide our rooms settlement! Everybody, come here please!"
Everybody came as told yet Tao was still taking his selcas.
I only stared at him as Luhan-ge dragged the panda boy into the circle. We
discussed and finally decided room 1 will be for me and Chen, room 2 for Xiumin
and Tao, and room 3 for Luhan and Xingxing.
It was 8 p.m when we arrived as I remembered and the next 2
hours were us unpacking our clothes and settle our daily chores. It was full of
whines and arguments yet we finally made it somehow.
***
11 p.m, the other members would have been sleeping in their
rooms. Chen were sleeping in the bed next to mine yet I found myself insomniac.
I let myself in the living room as I slid out my newly bought phone. I unlocked
it and stare at it for a moment, until my thumb danced to click the numbers I
always yearn to call.
The small sounds deafening my ears as I patiently waiting
for the other line to pick up.
"Hello. You are contacting Wu households."
The crook of my eyes began to wet as tears were forming
slowly. My breath slow as saltiness of my tears reached his lips. All the
memories I had somehow was brought back in front of my eyes, I felt the pain was
washed ashore yet the flowers bloomed creating unbearable happiness inside.
"Mom?" then silent.
"It's me... Kevin is going to debut."
Sobs could be heard from the other line.
-END-
